MLIA, honestly.

First off, Lara: this is for you.  May your endeavours to evade those spiders be successful.

 

Now a story...

I have always loved the idea of having a summer job.  Being able to make your own moolah, and then being able to spend it on things (and save for university, yeah, yeah) like...like...

And no, I'm not referring to buying the clothes, I'm referring to buying the sexy bitches wearing dem garments. (It's late, there are attractive men onscreen, please excuse my crudeness.)

Anyhow, up until now I've been unable to actually get a summer job, legally.  What the hell? Basically the law was: FOREIGNERS? WORK? WITH NO WORK PERMIT? WHUT. >:O NO. So no job for Wallis...:(  So I was alone for some summers, and had to wait for my friends to stop working, this was only recently though.  I made good money in another occupation though...

NO. I know what you were thinking...a floozy, right? EXACTLY. Unfortunately it usually ended up something like this:

So instead (I'm joking, I have about as much sex appeal as a mullet does, serz), I babysat and made REALLY GOOD MONEY: $15/hour, so after about 6 hours: KAH-CHING! And since it was for family friends, I was always given extra. ;) Holla atchyo babysitter!

Anyhow, this summer I've decided that since I've moved to wonderful place where I can work and earn money, that I'd apply for a job.

The town I live in, is to be frank the tiniest, most insignificant place ever. It's kinda..."hick-y"...I've seen so many plaid shirts this week, as well as joyously withered old women who work in the public offices, and young mothers and fathers (eg: I saw an 18 year old couple) pushing around their strollers smoking (sometimes swearing up a storm)..and more.  However, this isn't the whole of the town, this is just the surface I think...I think...we'll see.  

So, I thought to myself, "HEY. LET'S START LIVING SOMEWHAT MORE CLICHÉ!" (did I ever rant about how cliché my life is...? So, I applied for a job. Where?

       AND    

Yeah. I applied as a part-time worker there.  Laugh your ass away.  I certainly am.  I actually just pictured Wallis working there.

My coherency levels will reach a new low.  In fact when I even called the Manager's Office at McDonald's, the conversation went a bit like this:

(RING RING)

Manager, sir (MS): This is ________, Manager at McDonald's. Can I help?

Wallis: (In a formal, rehearsed tone): Hello, my name is Wallis C.  I'm just calling to inquire about whether or not you have any job opportunities?

MS:...whut?

Wallis: (Oh...that must have sounded odd, come up with something new!) Just...uh...do you, do you have any..are yo-

MS: What?

Wallis: (Really nervous about how stupid I sound now) Do you have jobs? Are you giving people jobs?

MS: Yes, of course. (He wanted to say, "DUHHHH")

Wallis: (regains confidence) I was looking online, and see that I can apply online...and yeah, I can...job.

MS:...

Wallis: SO, if I do that...will it come to you, or would you rather see me in person? What works for you? My face? 

MS:...what?

Wallis: (sigh) I'll apply and online, and you shall get my application. Have a great day. 

MS: (all cheerful) Goodbye!

Oh Wallis, COHERENT. SO. WELL. YOU. IS....so, I applied online there, and then I applied to Tim Horton's.  Now I'm just waiting.  I'll go into my ho-dunk little town tomorrow and look for jobs in non-commercial places, see if I'm lucky...there's this place called "Pita Pantry", a health store :D 

Anyhow, it's now 1am. And it's time to read the rest of the Hunger Games, which by the way: ROCK. 

Love, 

Captain.

PS: http://www.mcdonalds.ca/en/careers/benefits.aspx Love.

Goodnight Wallis, love Nijmeh.

My friends' imaginations never cease  to amaze me.  I asked Nijmeh to tell me a story, at 12:30AM and this is what she came up with:

 once upon a time there was a pirate ship and it was crewed but, who else, johnny depp and they sailed the oceans blue and by they i mean johnny and his crew of attractive matties. 

• and one day while making port on a traders island they were approuched by some strangely dressed men in black fighting gear
• can you guess who they were? 
  • who else? jace and his worthy band of shadowhunters
  • and they demanded (you know jace) that they be sailed to the lake of the mermaids 
    • but ofcourse, lakes aren't easy to get to when you are sailing the black pearl
    • so johnny declined saying there wouldnt be room for jace and the rum and he picked the rum 
      • jace pulled out his sword and challenged johnny to a duel
      • now johnny was a skilled swordsman, but he could tell that he would be unable to win this match against jace and his backup, and his pirate companions werent likely to be much help
      • so he decide to use his wit to escape this battle 
        • he calculated that if half of the shadow hunters came then enough rum could be brought to keep him going for one week, and he would be able to make port again and restock, and possibly lose some shadowhunters on the way.
        • he was also interested to go to mermaid lake because it was rumoured that there was a castle nearby where the people had unusual powers. can you guess what that castle was?
        • it was ofcourse, hogwarts, but lets not get ahead of ourselves.
        • johnny told jace he could come and bring three others, and that he should give him a heading
        • jace was rather reluctant but agreed, seeing that he could not take any more on as the ship was rather full already, however he did not like being so out numbered incace a mutiny occured
        • so they began to sail for mermaids lake, located far in the north sea.
        • soon it came time for them to make port, but johnny could not rid himself of the shadowhunters for they followed him like stink on a pig.
          • they reached a land mass and had to countinue on foot, and now it was johnny's turn to follow jace, as jace tried to send johnny away he could not as johnny still wished to claim the magical powers of the mermaids
          • they soo reached a great black lake, and a castle towered nearby
          • they knew they had reached hogwarts
          • yet before they could lay siege to the castle they were attacked themselves by three teenagers in black robes. one had bushy hair and was a girl, one had ginger hair and stood holding her hand and the other had black hair and a lighting scar on his forehead
          • they did not have time to reach for their wepons as shadowhunter and pirate alike had a spell cast on them
          • it sounded something like obliviate and they awoke with that their last memory, johnny in tortuga his arms around two harlets and jace in new york his hand in clary's
          • the end
          • my battery is dead
          • bye bye
            
            
            Love you potatoe. I do.
            
            
              

• • • • • • 
            
            For you.
            
            
            
            

So Wrong, but so Right.

Today I have engaged in activities that I find questionable, and do not coincide with my normal personality traits (and also stuck glow-in-the-dark stars on the ceiling of my room):


This morning, went on Youtube looking for some Panic! at the Disco stuff (I've recently grown re-obsessed with them, and that. is. wonderful.) However, I got sidetracked and then looked at the "Suggestions" bar next to a video I was watching (I should have already known that I was doomed the minute I clicked that).  The video was on the Vevo channel, so as usual Vevo was trying to sell new crappy sounding music, but I clicked nevertheless. What did I land on? Probably the runner up to the worst song ever written (after "Friday" of course): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sdbyG2MrBHk&ob=av3e

After that, I continued to make odd decisons: I decided to watch Last Friday Night by Katy Perry, and actually that was a good odd decision.  The video is rather cute and amusing (and it has Darren Criss...WHUT WHUT!), I realized I quite like Katy Perry. She's...cool.


THEN I MADE A NUTELLA SMOOTHIE. 


That was the best decision I've ever made. Afterwards, I decided to hunt down more Panic! stuff, because they're just...<insert words to describe how much love I feel for them).  I also posted lots of Panic! related links all over Lara's wall (sorreeee), I never really do that...because...I just...I don't understand the Internet, and links, posting, blahblahmush is what that is to me.  However, I was reading an interview Brendon Urie (nom) had done and it was a list of his "favourite" things: http://www.spin.com/articles/m​y-favorite-things-panics-brend​on-urie, and he mentions his favourite online clothes store (weird font...), TopMan. So...I began to go looking at his favourite store...(such a stalker, or rather shopping for my future male child? Or guy friends?)


And I came across this...:


http://www.topman.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ProductDisplay?beginIndex=0&viewAllFlag=&catalogId=33056&storeId=12555&productId=2527865&langId=-1&sort_field=null&categoryId=207267&parent_categoryId=207169&pageSize=20 


Is it really bad that I find that absolutely wonderful? It is. Is it worse that I pictures Brendon wearing it? Oh hell yeah, I'm sorry Sarah D: But I find it reallyyyyy fantastic. 


And then I found the formal wear...


http://www.topman.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ProductDisplay?beginIndex=0&viewAllFlag=&catalogId=33056&storeId=12555&productId=2558274&langId=-1&sort_field=Relevance&categoryId=261027&parent_categoryId=&pageSize=20&refinements=category~[261028|261027]&noOfRefinements=1


DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT THIS IS DOING TO ME? I WANT TO BUY CLOTHES FROM HERE NOW...FOR ANYONE!


http://www.topman.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/CatalogNavigationSearchResultCmd?catalogId=33056&storeId=12555&langId=-1&viewAllFlag=false&sort_field=Relevance&categoryId=261027&beginIndex=1&pageSize=20#catalogId=33056&storeId=12555&langId=-1&viewAllFlag=false&sort_field=Relevance&categoryId=261027&beginIndex=1&pageSize=20&refinements=category~[261028|261027]&noOfRefinements=1

Just...look at it all.  Tell me I'm wrong.


Anyways, I'm going to go scrapbooking now...oh dear...what's happening to me? I'm not even sure anymore.


-The Captain-

Where am I?

I haven't touched this blog in...ages.  I'm sorry! D:

Admittedly though, I've been busy as hell.  Doing what? Well uprooting myself from home and moving to the great white north, where I shall reside for the forseeable future. JOY. -.- Okay, I can't be that negative, because to be honest, it's quite nice here.  I get to see family and do...things...fun...things. (I'm sorry, coherency is not my forte.)

To compensate for my innability to talk/type/whatever else, here is a picture of me drinking a chai latte:

I swear, these are God's gift to the Earth children, to let them know that there is good in this world. They make everything better. NOM NOM NOM.

Anyways, I will start writing updates for the blog more frequently, I suppose.  For now, this is just a little "filler" to let everyone (ANYONE WHO CARES, OH WOE IS ME), know that I am still alive...and drinking chai. YEAH, MOFOS.

Love,

El Captain. Cheersssss.